Vitamin C4’s guide to day time drinking:
Wednesday, January 13th, 2010BOOZE: beer and wine
SMOKING: on the patio.
ATMOSPHERE: A
SCUMMY LEVEL: D
With a lot of table seating this popular night time bar is more then comforting, and even better in my eyes, during the day time. With a consistently scheduled staff it’s quick to become a regular at this day time hot spot. Not only is it an excellent place to order up a pint and a shot and shoot the shit with your pals, it is also a wonderful and comfortable place to read, write or doodle on bar napkins while listening to either rock, punk, occasionally metal, blues, soul or jazz music (bartenders choice). With a fully stocked bar of beer, wines and hard alcohols, it is easy to find yourself a little tipsy quicker then you might have hoped.
BOOZE: full bar
SMOKING: yessir
ATMOSPHERE: A
SCUMMY LEVEL: C
This is a tricky one. I do, on my deepest and darkest nights of drinking, tend to enjoy a drink from the Avenue mostly for the novelty of it, and as long as I am surrounded by my tougher looking friends. But for this day time spot, it is nice to grab a pitcher of beer and head out to the back deck. With the sun shinning down on a large wooden deck with tables and bench seating, it’s a lovely spot to laugh loud and talk dirty with your pals, and again – also good for getting some reading done, as long as there isn’t a football game on the television.
BOOZE: full bar
SMOKING: yup yup
ATMOSPHERE: B
SCUMMY LEVEL: A-
4) The ‘Ol Flask in the bag trick:
This is pretty self explanatory although not entirely recommended. This day time drinking trick might indicate possible problems with drinking. But, it is okay if you are in a position where you will need it for later. Quick to drop a quick sip on a cola or coffee, the flask is ready when you are. Downside is that it will often leave you smelling of booze in awkward locations that aren’t bars.
BOOZE: whatever you decide to pack it with
SMOKING: you tell me.
ATMOSPHERE: C
SCUMMY LEVEL: A-
From all of us here at VitaminC4, drink safely and responsible, and we raise our glass to you.
Cheers.
Dear Rold Gold Pretzels,
Sunday, March 15th, 2009These days, it seems all my friends are gettings Missed Connections™. But never me. Never me. Is it some sort of character flaw, Rold Gold Pretzels? Is it because I didn’t buy mushrooms off of that guy who offered them to me from his moving bicycle tonight? Do I lack that “joie de vivre” that inspires greater men to lie curled around their porcelain thrones until the first rays of dawn grant sweet, sweet oblivion? Could it simply be because I spend my Friday nights looking at bookshelves on Craigslist, alpha-testing Firefox plugins and drinking the Raynal V.S.O.P. that I purchased for $9.99 at Trader Joe’s to “cook with”? Do the women of today have something against rhetorical questions, Rold Gold Pretzels? Well, here’s a Missed Connection™ for you:
Mojitos on the moon – m4w
You: A tall, beautiful blonde in a long green coat that probably came from Urban Outfitters but could have been military surplus if you ignore the egregious violation of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”
Me: The dude who was mocking (to no one in particular) the 15-minute Girls Gone Wild infomercial(?!) on TV to cover the fact that I was paying it rather too much attention.
I would have struck up a conversation, but you were too busy showing off your engagement ring.
Yes, Rold Gold Pretzels, it was exactly like that one Alanis Morissette song “Ironic”, except that Alanis didn’t want to write about the part where if she walked into the Asti I would burn her with my cigarette.
In conclusion, please send me at least 1 but no more than 3 women who are too neurotic or socially inept to communicate except via anonymous “year 3000 bullshit” classified-ad-type web sites. Plus one box of your assorted pretzels.
Best Regards,
Ethan James
P.S. Let’s all send our very warmest Vitamin C4 Spring Break Wishes to Hiram Coffee, who is serving as roadie for The Devil Makes Three until late this month. Even though he is a jerk for leaving us and I need his help for all of my “real” “articles”. Last I heard, he was in Vegas and had just ridden a mechanical bull. He may or may not have soiled himself. I wasn’t entirely clear on that last bit, as it’s difficult to convey tongue-in-cheekedness via SMS without emoticons.
P.P.S. FUCK emoticons.